Gentlefolk,
I have had an epiphany and would appreciate your patience whilst I set out the following proposed amendments to
RtE for the sole purpose of improving the original rules
beyond recognition. Like most other
PROPOSITIONS and unlike the original rules, these have
NOT been extensively play tested as they came to me in a dream where I was visited by
Richard Sharpe of
95th Rifles fame.
So I commend these to
l'Empereur Barry and his
Chief of Staff Clarence but, since there is no need for play testing
Mr O'Brien, your
P45 is in the post.
1. The Initiative phase should be renamed the
Mine's Bigger than Yours Phase and anyone who fields a Wellington should have a
+2 to his die roll for having a hooky nose.
2. The Manoeuvre Phase is now called the
Walkabout Phase and any
kilted Highlanders moving at greater than half speed through
bracken must take a
-2 in the Shooty-Bang-Bang Wee Balls Phase (I'll explain later) to simulate the fact that some of them may have lost their balls. Also,
French troops will no longer use
Manoeuvre Points below:
But will be issued instead with cheese rations:
3. The Firing Phase shall be broken into the
Shooty-Bang-Bang Big Balls Phase where artillery will only be allowed to fire on alternate turns (consider this a toilet break) instead of refitting at the end of four rounds of firing to assist the arithmetically challenged. In the
Shooty-Bang-Bang Wee Balls Phase (I told you I'd explain), any
Scottish infantry from Larkhall get an additional
D3 worth of
D6s when firing at green-uniformed French dragoons.
4. The Melee Phase, now called the
Get it Up 'em! Phase, will avoid the abrasive question of cavalry being forced to charge squares by the simple expedient of
replacing the square with a circle. In the interests of mathematical precision and simplicity the cavalry charge will take place as follows:
The cavalry move will be dissected by the
Golden Mean and any cavalry commencing a charge on a circle prior to reaching the
Golden Mean will no longer have to complete this charge, whereas, if they started after the
Golden Mean they must follow through; however, if they commenced
EXACTLY on the
Golden Mean then there is the possibility that
Dave Imrie can take an award-winning photograph.
The
Golden Mean may be verified by the simple formula
(a + b)(a − b) = ab where the
Product of their
Sum and
Differences is
Equal to the
Product of the
Numerals themselves.
The infantry circle does not have to check resolve but instead, the owning player measures the exact circumference of his circle and, if it is greater that
2π times the radius, he stands fast and collects the Nobel prize for mathematics, otherwise, he runs away.
5. Finally, the Resolve phase is to be renamed the
Run Away Phase to represent more accurately the heroics of those who insist on fielding early Austrian armies.
Gentlefolk, your comments and opinions would be warmly welcomed and I sincerely look forward to the following six pages of irrelevant discussion as I intend to release these anyway, with Barry's permission of course, as a
leather bound pdf file at the bargain price of
£49.99 + VAT and Postage -
PayPal only.
I remain,
Your Most Humble and Obedient Servant etc.,
Jim O'Neill
-
for and on behalf of richardsharpe.